A Smiling Ant :)

A tiny little thing walking majestically at the very edge of the building and I happened to follow her for a while now with my eyes. How did I know it’s female (well, female ants do not have wings). While walking she was oozing out with confidence. My heart skipped a beat or two when the wind was strong, I wondered if it will throw her off the building.

Looking into her world, abruptly brought back one instance from my school days. It was my 7th standard, I being one of the notoriously mischievous kids belonged to that particular category of students with whom teachers behaved in a peculiar way. During parents teachers meeting they insult us in front of our parents in a creatively artistic way –“Sir your daughter is a brilliant child with lots of potential, she can really do wonders provided she invests her energy into studies instead of all the mischievous activities”. On this parents feel like not only we are wasting their money we are also wasting their talents and intelligence. Anyways my mom and dad were cool enough and never took it personally.

The instance was of a particular period when our teacher was not present and we got the strictest one as substitute. She came and asked us to maintain pin-drop silence as she had some papers to evaluate. As the class settled into an uncomfortable and forced silence, my stomach signaled my mouth that it’s empty and even without consulting my brain told this in a loud whisper to my friend. It came out as in a zoom online class, you leave yourself unmute by mistake and attend a call from your bestie. The teacher frowned at me and as expected from her, ordered me to sit on the last corner bench, with head down and facing the wall. I felt a little ashamed and sad but took the position as instructed. Now, as I was staring at that wall, I met this little tiny thing gliding on the wall, all engrossed in her own world. Our eyes met and I realized that she wanted to strike a conversation with me. I smiled at her and to my surprise she smiled back. Ant’s smile is cute 🙂😅. One thing led to another and we both were giggling🤣. Obviously my teacher and the whole class being mere humans heard me laughing by myself 🙄. When asked for the reason, my story was considered as another prank and she elevated my punishment and asked me to get out of the class. Again a little embarrassed, I went out and stood there all alone, feeling lonely. My only worry was my favorite teacher should not pass by, also I prayed that my friends should come out 😉. I am not boasting, in another few seconds they joined me and we eventually had a wonderful time out there 🤣.

About the above 45 minutes, I feel that my emotions were flowing from one extreme to another with ease.

Oh my dear, that’s why it’s called childhood!

As adults we are having a rush hour existence, running here, there, everywhere never quite catching up with the inner self. We invest a lot of energy into so many external things in-order to excel or do wonders. We get so used to the frenetic that when silence does come, we grab the nearest device and fill it with screen time. Seldom take time to slow down and reflect.

Inside that closed door, there are a myriad of emotions, dreams, disappointments waiting to be heard and understood. We have been trained to keep them behind the closed doors. We abandon that room and choose to stay busy. As a result, we lose the touch with our emotions, and they become stagnant.

God designed our emotions to be gauges. They are meant to report to us. We should open that door and deal with it. The Bible never advises denial of emotion.

God would not have us internalize or invalidate our real emotions. Neither would he tell us just to “get them out” by venting. Worry or any negative emotion are not something to “get rid of” — that’s self-rejection, if not self-hatred. Instead, the Spirit of Jesus wants us to open the hurting part of our self to receive his comfort and grace.

King David applied it aptly, he took a broad spectrum of emotion straight to God. His emotions showed in tears, shouting, singing, and even intense dancing”

David evaluated his own heart and told God about it; once He got things off His chest, he was filled with hope again. He believed His heart was safest in the hands of God.    

Instead of being an emotionally detached zombie, let’s be emotionally secure human by having a real and authentic relationship with our Heavenly Father.

A.W. Tozer : “There is a restlessness within us that cannot be satisfied until we rest fully in God!”

God Bless You All!

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